February may be the month of love, but your relationship deserves your attention all-year round. Why would you wait until Valentine’s Day to show some love? In fact, there have been multiple studies that reflect couples frequently break up just before and just after Valentine’s Day. It isn’t all it cracked up to be.
Expectations & Comparisons
There are a lot of expectations around Valentine’s Day. People expect their partner to take it to the next level and outdo their friends. When you set your expectations so high, disappointment is inevitable. Restaurants increase their prices, the cost of a single rose exceeds a bouquet any other day of the year… it’s nonsensical. Yet, we allow ourselves to get suckered into those expectations and we make those comparisons. In fact, you may even have enjoyed your evening at the time, only to feel dissatisfied about it later once you compared it to others.
Does any of this sound healthy for a relationship? Of course not!
Many people think they can coast all-year round and then up their game come Valentine’s Day. These shaky relationships tend to be uncovered during the month of love because it magnifies all of the problems they have experienced. Plus, the factors that make relationships truly thrive… well, you have to practice them more than just one day out of the year. A 10-course meal at a Michelin restaurant isn’t going to fix an ailing or broken relationship. Your time and attention all-year round? Well, it might be a different story.
This shouldn’t come as a surprise to you. Imagine how your houseplants would respond if you only watered them once a year. By the time you got to them, they would be dead and beyond repair. So will your relationship be if you don’t care for it properly. The good news is that you can start this today and we have some helpful tips to get you back on track.
- New Experiences – take a cooking class together, try out pottery, get season tickets to your favorite team. Trying new experiences together will trigger a release of oxytocin that provides you and your relationship a natural boost. It will keep your relationship feelings new and fresh.
- Help Out – life can get unbearably busy, so why not help your partner out? It might be that you make dinner, that you tackle the laundry, wash the car or tackle some of their errands. It really doesn’t matter what it is, relieving a bit of pressure from your partner can make a major difference. It’s something they will appreciate and it reminds them just how much you care.
This isn’t your excuse to ignore Valentine’s Day. You can celebrate it, just don’t make it the only focus. A relationship requires hard work, affection, and gratitude and those are things that you can practice every single day.