Father’s Day is coming, and for those of you who don’t have a relationship with your father, you need to prepare yourself emotionally and mentally. Remember this, toxic people say things and do things that reflect the way they feel about themselves. What they feel about themselves is what they project onto you. It’s vital that you remember that their behavior isn’t your fault. Maybe he’s not toxic, he’s just absent (which is toxic in its own way). It isn’t easy, especially if you’re a parent yourself.
It’s supposed to be a day of celebration, but you don’t feel much like celebrating a broken relationship. Instead, you feel isolated and alone as you watch people post pictures of their dads on social media. Not to mention all of the commercials and advertisements in the run-up to the big day. You have options.
Why not spend the day with your mom and celebrate with her instead? Or, another person in your life who acted like a father figure for you? Make sure that you take the time to acknowledge them and how they have impacted your life. You don’t have to do anything special; you might just want to drop a line or even hang out doing nothing much in particular.
You’re not the only person who finds this “holiday” rough. If you have friends who also struggle with the day, why not arrange a group event? It could be a movie marathon, hold a barbecue, a hike, a trip to the movies or anything at all! The point of it is that you surround yourself with people whom you care about, who care about you, and band together. You can focus on the people that you do have in your life, and that could be your friends, siblings or other family members. Try to focus on what you do have.
Why not buy yourself a gift? Buy yourself a book, treat yourself to a new outfit, take yourself to brunch or just do something that you enjoy. Better yet, why not book a trip away for the weekend? You don’t need to go anywhere fancy, though feel free to, just get away for a break. Make it all about you. If you can’t manage an entire weekend away, just go somewhere for the day. Somewhere that you love, that makes you feel happy.
Take a Break
A social media break. You can pretty much guarantee that you will see a stream of photos and messages dedicated to dads on social media. So, log out and avoid social media for the day (or weekend). If seeing these types of messages makes you feel bad, don’t put yourself in a position to read them. On certain social media sites, you can mute words and phrases; this can help you avoid seeing these messages.
Just do what makes you feel good. If that means running errands, getting a massage, going to a yoga class or hanging out with friends, do that! It could just be any other Sunday.